School jokes in english
It was at the end of the school year and a kindergarten
teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils. The florist's son handed her a
gift. She shook it, held it overhead and said, "I bet I know what it is?.
Some flowers." "That's right" the boy said, "but how did you know?" "Oh, just a wild guess," she said. The next pupil was the candy shop owner's daughter. The teacher held her gift overhead, shook it and said, "I bet I can guess what it is. A box of sweets." "That's right, but how did you know?" asked the girl. "Oh, just a wild guess," said the teacher. The next gift was from the son of the liquor store owner. The teacher held the package overhead, but it was leaking. She touched a drop of the leakage with her finger and touched it to her tongue. "Is it wine?" she asked. "No," the boy replied, with some excitement. The teacher repeated the process, taking a larger drop of the leakage to her tongue. "Is it champagne?" she asked. "No," the boy replied, with more excitement. The teacher took one more taste before declaring, "I give up, what is it?" With great glee, the boy replied, "It's a puppy!"
Some flowers." "That's right" the boy said, "but how did you know?" "Oh, just a wild guess," she said. The next pupil was the candy shop owner's daughter. The teacher held her gift overhead, shook it and said, "I bet I can guess what it is. A box of sweets." "That's right, but how did you know?" asked the girl. "Oh, just a wild guess," said the teacher. The next gift was from the son of the liquor store owner. The teacher held the package overhead, but it was leaking. She touched a drop of the leakage with her finger and touched it to her tongue. "Is it wine?" she asked. "No," the boy replied, with some excitement. The teacher repeated the process, taking a larger drop of the leakage to her tongue. "Is it champagne?" she asked. "No," the boy replied, with more excitement. The teacher took one more taste before declaring, "I give up, what is it?" With great glee, the boy replied, "It's a puppy!"
Miss Jones had been giving her second-grade students a
lesson on science. She had explained about magnets and showed how they would
pick up nails and other bits of iron. Now it was question time and she asked,
"My name begins with the letter 'M' and I pick up things. What am I?"
A little boy on the front row proudly said, "You are a mother!"
As a new school principal, Mr. Mitch was checking over
his school on the first day. Passing the stockroom, he was startled to see the
door wide open and teachers bustling in and out, carrying off books and
supplies in preparation for the arrival of students the next day. The school
where he had been a Principal the previous year had used a check-out system
only slightly less elaborate than that at Fort Knox. Cautiously, he asked the school's
long time Custodian, "Do you think it's wise to keep the stock room
unlocked and to let the teachers take things without requisitions?" The
Custodian looked at him gravely... "We trust them with the children, don't
we?"